“Contentment” – A state of Being

I met a lady yesterday that personified the word “contentment”. The tiny apartment where she and her husband lived was very small and housed seven people living there, yet, the radiance of her countenance was of such happiness and contentment that no one who met her would ever have known the place was too crowded or that she had any problems whatsoever.
She smiled a wide, glorious smile as she talked to me about her children and grandchildren that ran gleefully through the apartment. Her eyes were filled with compassion as she spoke lovingly about her husband who was out of town in Georgia ministering to others. Everything within her small environment was beautiful.

When I left the apartment, I was overwhelmed by her beautiful state of being. She was totally content and happy in God. She understood what many people do not and that is contentment is not measured by how much you have or do not have. Contentment is understanding the fact that God is our provider. Whatever state we are in, whether good or bad, as His children, we should be content because He is in charge.

From the brief experience of meeting this woman of God for the first time ever, I was reminded of this and thanked Him for all of the good and struggles of my life. In this new year of 2013, I will continue to remind myself that contentment is a “state of being” in which trusting God and not my own judgment is the correct way of handling life.

Is Your Life Making a Difference in the Lives of Others?

Now that I’m 55 years old, I’ve been doing a lot of reflecting regarding my life’s journey.  One of the things that has consistently come across my mind is wondering what impact I have made in the lives of others.  You see, when we’re young, our focus is on how we can become accomplished and have more money, a great career, wonderful family, and other things that are self-related. Not saying this type of focus is wrong because these things are important, especially in American society.  But at some point the importance of why we were born and our earthly purpose should become more important.  We should begin recognizing that our life is more than accumulating things that will be left for someone else once we die. Our life should have a deeper meaning, a purpose for which someone can truly say that we made a difference in the world or at least in one person’s life as a result of our existence.

When most people think of who has made a great contribution to society, names such as John and Robert Kennedy, Martin Luther King, Steve Jobs and other well-known icons are noted. Although these people have left a positive mark on society, each of us has the same responsibility to make a “good” difference in the lives of the people we touch daily. If you have never thought about this, remember it is possible that someone is watching you and may be mimicking your lifestyle. What do they see? What difference are you making for future generations? What positive influences are you making in the lives of your family, friends, co-workers, and those in the community? What have you done over your life that others can say has truly made a difference in their life? When you are laying stretched out in a coffin, with no more life left in you, what TRUTH do you want people to say about you?

Remember, we all make the mistake of thinking that we have many years of time to live, be happy, and prosperous. However, all one needs to do is remember the tragedies that have happened where people were just going to the movies or to class and were met with their untimely death.

Each day we live is a gift with no guarantee of having another one, so, ask yourself:   Is my life making a difference in the lives of others?  If not, start to develop habits that will.

Who’s the Boss?

For those of us who work on a job, there is usually someone who has authority over a team of people, a project or an organization. They are the ones responsible for the outcome of things or are looked to for direction from others. Whether their leadership skills are on top of the line or the worse is not dependent on the people that follow them but on their own leadership skills, and decision making capabilities.

When it comes to your own life, who is the boss? God has given all of us His compass to use as a guide through reading His word and following it; however, who is the boss of you and your decisions? How many times do you actually get it right.. with “it” being making the correct decisions in your life and maybe the choices that affect others such as children, spouse, work, etc. not going horribly wrong?  Who is listening to you and is what you’re saying as a leader truly sound and make sense or are you making decisions based on your own ego or the fact you have authoritative power alone.

You see, everyone that is assumed to have authority don’t necessarily make the best leaders. How many times have you had a horrible boss and instead of following their instruction, you followed your own decision or that of another presumed leader?

In order to determine who your boss is, start by understanding their credentials and leadership capabilities. Then, consider their history and ability to lead you correctly.  If you are a believer in God, then His Word is the best history book for understanding how He works. If you need further clarification, and you can’t seem to find much in your own life to think about that He’s done, consider that when you opened your eyes, got out of bed, and began your day, it was not of your own power. If that’s not enough for you, then how about thinking of all of the sperm that was waiting to fertilize your mother’s egg before your birth and out of all of them waiting, the one that was to make YOU was decided and here you still are….. even reading this blog today. That’s a very powerful boss that made that happen!

Horrible Bosses You Hate to Work For!

Have you ever experienced working for a horrible boss? My definition of a horrible boss is one that has any or all of the following characteristics:

• No work ethics or sense of values i.e. takes credit for work that isn’t theirs
• Gossips and lies about you or other employees
• Controlling and always finds fault in everything you do
• Impatient and hard to get along with
• Jealous and full of self righteousness
• Abusive of power
• Talks down to you and others
• Lacks effective listening and communication skills
• Lies and is untrustworthy
• Unpredictable .. always changing their mind on a project to benefit themselves
• Shows co-workers favoritism
• Not a team player
• Not a motivator of their staff
• Stays in their office and doesn’t interact with staff
• Lacks leadership skills

There are a host of other characteristics that you may be able to add; however, you get the idea.  When a boss has any of these qualities and you are constantly exposed to them with no way out except to quit, this can be very stressful and could cause mental and psychological harm to you which can manifested into physical illness.

So what have you done to stop the cycle within you because you do have a choice outside of quitting? First, you must understand that you have the ability to change the way you think and react to situations. No one can MAKE you mad enough to STAY in that condition. You have a choice in how you think and what you will concentrate on. Therefore, you can choose to think of the person in another way such as as a unhappy, unloved, and as a  miserable soul in need of love and guidance. Then you can begin to feel compassion for them rather than anger. This by no means is an easy thing to do especially when you’ve been pissed at the person for long periods of time. The fact is, you really may not know why the person is the way they are. Their attitude may be such because something has triggered it at home or in their childhood and the feel helpless to change it. Since you are a person they have some power over they seek to control or make your life as miserable as their own.

Remember, insecure people with power can be very dangerous.

What has been your experiences with horrible bosses? How have you handed situations with them? Let’s talk about it and see if we can come up with a solution.

Leadership Decision Making Characteristics

What makes a great leader?  Here are some characteristics to consider:

1. Praying for guidance and waiting to hear
2. Listening to advisors that are of good character and offer wise counsel to help weigh all options that could take place BEFORE acting.
3. Having the ability to make decisions that are sound.
4. Being accountable for decisions made whether they were correct or not.

What is your mode of leadership when making decisions?  Are you one that jumps the gun and takes action before hearing or understanding the true situation?  I say “true” loosely because there is a difference between someone’s “opinion” regarding what may be going on and actual “facts” concerning the situation.

Do you take time to understand, use deductive reasoning, and pausing before acting? Are you caught up in the “power” of being the leader rather than being humble? What are your followers like? Do they only follow your direction because you are the leader, or, do they feel free enough to give you wise counsel?   These are all characteristics of being a great leader and should be taken into consideration when making decisions.

There are many more that will be added to this list but think about how any of these fit YOUR character now. Which are outstanding and which should you work on?